I don’t want a career anymore. I’m not interested in vying for raises, bonuses, or promotions. After my layoff, I thought I would return to my former profession, but now, I’m not so sure.
It feels strange to say that. Is there something wrong with me? My mind keeps swirling with conflicting ideas. Aren’t we supposed to covet our occupations? Isn’t that why teachers ask us what we want to be when we grow up and why every introduction begins with, “What do you do?”
As a child, I wanted to become a speechwriter, English teacher, professor, and author. In my teens, I added psychiatrist and social researcher to that list too.
I daydreamed about my future partner, children, and a small house out in the country. I spent a lot of time envisioning my future career too.
What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?
This September, my Facebook feed overflowed with smiling children holding back-to-school signs. The titles all looked similar; First Day of Preschool, First Day of Third Grade, and even First Day of Senior Year.
Many of the signs included the child’s name, grade, and future career. The first read I want to be a firefighter when I grow up, the next listed teacher. Others included veterinarian, you tuber, doctor, basketball player, park ranger, and ballerina.
What do you want to be when you grow up? Think about that question for a moment. How did you answer it when you were a child?
As I looked at those back-to-school boards, the question suddenly seemed small and narrow. Why do we ask kids about their future occupations?
Why don’t we ask, “What are you passionate about?” or “What do you love to do?”
What If I Don’t Want a Career?
Shouldn’t we ask open-ended questions that broaden our children’s minds? Questions like:
- What do you want to learn?
- What fills you with joy?
- Who inspires you?
- What makes you feel proud?
- Who do you want to help?
- What do you want to accomplish?
Why don’t we ask any of these questions? Instead, we emphasize a child’s future occupation. Staring at those back-to-school signs, it’s easy to see why our careers define us in adulthood.
By asking, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” we focus our children’s attention on making money instead of creating a life they love. Why don’t we focus on who they want to be and what they value?
I Don’t Want a Career
This should’ve been the year that my youngest went off to kindergarten. I planned to walk into the classroom, hug my son, and then drive off to my new job, but COVID-19 threw a wrench into that plan.
In January, I was actively looking for work. By March, I stopped my search. At the time, we withdrew my five-year-old from preschool and began the arduous process of virtual school for my eight-year-old.
At the beginning of the year, I intended to return to my former career as a software engineer, but as the days tick by, I find myself changing course. The more I think about it, the more I realize, I don’t want a career.
I’m 40 and I don’t want to work anymore. Could my thoughts be age related?
I Don’t Want a Career Anymore
After graduation, my career provided the external validation I craved. I needed others to tell me I was smart and capable. I defined myself by the amount of work I could complete in a day, and the number of times I could figure out a problem that no one else could solve.
The more my bosses praised me, the harder I worked. I tied my value to my job. When my salary grew, so did my confidence. I wore my work ethic like a badge of honor. I stayed later than anyone else and completed more tasks than most of my coworkers combined.
Do you know how people think it’s good to be busy? I was never idle at work. I began to correlate stress with success. A healthy work-life balance didn’t exist for me.
When I was first starting out, I needed to hustle and push. As the youngest member of the team, I had to prove my worth. The harder I worked, the more respect I received. The more business managers reached out and asked for me by name.
My persistence paid off both in salary and promotions. It also helped me work on the best projects with the best people. I rarely maintained the code I wrote, which is a software developer’s dream. As soon as I implemented features, I moved on to a new project.
I pushed myself, and I was proud of the work I produced. I still am, but things are different now, because I don’t need a career to define me.
As time passes, ideas keep swirling in my mind, and each time the conclusion seems to be the same. I don’t want a career anymore. Maybe I don’t want to work anymore at all.
I Don’t Care About My Career Anymore
Don’t get me wrong. There are benefits to having a career, significant financial benefits! If I hadn’t become a software engineer, I wouldn’t be living mortgage free or have the option to consider not working anymore. I wouldn’t be able to say, “I don’t want a career.”
I’m passionate, energetic, and ready to help the world, but that doesn’t mean I want a career path. I don’t care about my career anymore.
There are certainly perks of working, like learning new skills and working with fun and intelligent team members.
I didn’t love my job, but I didn’t hate it either. There were parts, like problem-solving, that I enjoyed immensely. I know a lot of people are miserable at work. I wasn’t one of those people. Work never became a drudgery for me.
I haven’t worked for nearly nine years. After such a long absence, it’s tough to envision going back to work. It’s hard to think about the time commitment and the lack of vacation days.
It’s not that I never want to work again. I just don’t want a career that pits me against coworkers or forces me to work long nights in the hopes of attaining raises and year-end bonuses.
I didn’t intend to walk away from my high-paying job nine years ago. If my employer hadn’t given me the boot, I wouldn’t have had the strength and courage to quit. It’s the reason I think of my layoff as a blessing in disguise.
Lots of people earn enough and step away, but I think I would’ve kept going. I would’ve kept climbing that corporate ladder even if my job didn’t make me happy.
I Want a Job, Not a Career
Why don’t I want a career? Quite honestly, I don’t want to feel stressed. At my old job, I suffered from a combination of bad management and short deadlines.
It was stressful to meet the demands of our business team while producing clean, bug-free code. If I return to work, I don’t want to feel that same pressure.
When I mentioned this problem to a friend, she said, “I want a job where I don’t have to think. Maybe you should get a mindless job where you don’t have to think either. You don’t need to feel stressed, and you don’t need to push yourself so hard. Pick something easy that makes money.”
I considered this for a moment, but I’m not sure I want to work on mindless tasks. That might be worse for me than the stress of working on complex problems.
Plus, an easy job won’t pay well. That’s why people pursue high-paying careers in the first place. It’s nearly impossible to make money without skills or talent.
Do I want a job without a career? Am I willing to give up time for a job that doesn’t pay a lot of money? It’s a question I keep asking.
Some people don’t have the option to pursue a high-paying job, but I have the skills to attain one. Should I use those skills or ignore them?
I Don’t Want to Work in Tech Anymore
I don’t want to work in the IT field. I don’t want a corporate job either. I worked as a software engineer for twelve years, and I don’t want to return. Instead of returning to my old career or searching for a new one, I’ve considered looking for a high-paying job that doesn’t require me to climb the corporate ladder. Does such a job exist, or is it merely a pipe dream?
Over the last nine years, I’ve had time to focus on the things that matter. Can I find a job that allows me to exercise, get a solid night of sleep, and take care of myself? Can I find a job that won’t force me to deal with deadlines, commutes, or excessive workloads?
Financial success is no longer my priority. I don’t need a career to alleviate my monetary stress, fears, or anxiety. I want to make a difference in the world, and my old job didn’t do that. My software didn’t change the world, or a single life, for that matter.
I don’t want to work in tech anymore. I’m not passionate about learning new technologies, tight deadlines, or staring at a computer screen for hours on end. Should I search for a job that isn’t in tech? Should I focus on a career change?
I Don’t Want to Work Anymore But I Need the Money
I know I’m not the only one that doesn’t want a career anymore. If you stumbled upon this post, you must be feeling similarly.
COVID-19 is changing our work patterns and behaviors. It’s forcing us to question what we do for a living and whether or not we enjoy it.
My neighbor recently said, “I don’t want to work anymore. I don’t want to return to my old job when the building reopens. This year made me realize how exhausted my work makes me. Now I see it and I don’t want to feel run down like that ever again.”
“But, how can I quit my job?” He said with a sigh. “I don’t want to work anymore, but I need the money. I’d like to hand in my computer and stop being an employee, but how can I?”
My neighbor is in his mid-forties and doesn’t want to work anymore. He wants to stop working at his current job so he can pursue a less stressful side hustle.
Not wanting a career might sound strange or unusual, but many of us would jump at the opportunity if we had a chance to leave a draining profession. If you could quit your full-time job, focus on your mental health, work fewer hours, and create a better work-life balance, would you do it? How incredible would it feel to walk into work today and not return to work tomorrow?
I Don’t Want a Job I Just Want a Life
I could see the pain in my neighbor’s eyes. What if I don’t want to work anymore? What should I do? It’s a question many of us ask ourselves.
What can you do if you don’t want to work anymore? It’s not easy to quit your job or choose not to pursue a career in the first place. The first step is to decrease your expenses so you can save money. Learn to stop buying stuff you don’t need and to live simply with less. As your costs decrease, you won’t feel so dependent on a big salary.
The second step is to earn as much as you can and begin stockpiling it. Take the money that you used to spend and stick it right into your bank account. Invest the money in the stock market so it can grow and support you. Passive income provides the path to financial independence, but you’ll need to find an effective way to build wealth.
Most of us can’t quit our careers when we decide we don’t want to work anymore. We have to build our nest eggs, which may mean climbing the corporate ladder a little longer.
I know that’s not the answer you were hoping to find here, but it’s true. If you already have a successful career, you’ll need to downgrade your lifestyle significantly or hold on to your job while you save for the future. If you learn to live simply, you can quit your job much faster.
Many people don’t want to work anymore but need the money. Unfortunately, the only way to get rid of your job is to decrease the amount of money you require.
I Don’t Want to Work Anymore What Should I Do?
What if I don’t want a career? What should I do? Will I find a new occupation, a job that doesn’t force me down the career track, or an alternate way to earn money?
I am grateful for my twelve year run as a software engineer, but I’m not sure what should come next. My core values no longer align with a job in the technology sector of corporate America. Long term I would like to find a job I enjoy or pursue creative endeavors that make money. Do you have any suggestions for me?
I’m sort of in the same boat as you- sort of. I retired thinking that I’d do something in a year or so after a little time off. I was thinking I could teach finance classes at one of the local universities or something like that. But go back to my career? Nope. Been there, done that, no thanks. I might do something completely different in another field- I have an MBA and I love to solve problems. I find myself solving problems around the house (see latest post…) but sooner or later I’m going to run out of those. I couldn’t do something mindless though, unless it was a whole lot of fun.
Do you want to go back to work? Does your husband want you to? Doesn’t sound like y’all need the money. Do you just feel like you “should?” What is the goal here? Ugh I sounded like a planner- sorry…
I didn’t intend to leave the workforce and I didn’t think I would be gone from it for so long. I don’t need a career to feel fulfilled, but part of me thinks I could do a lot of good for the world maybe for a non-profit, a school, honestly I have no idea.
Life is extremely busy right now with my boys, homeschooling, writing, and just taking care of life, but at some point I know I’ll want to help others outside of my family. When my boys were in school I volunteered a ton there. I worked on auction committees, volunteered in their classrooms, and spent a lot of time doing whatever activities were needed. I might just go back to volunteering, but those tasks are always short lived and part of me would like to work on a long running project.
I don’t want a career. I don’t want to climb the ladder of success, but I would like to do more for others. That might be a job, volunteering, or something else entirely. I’m still trying to figure out.
I have plenty of ways to fill my days, but I also think I could help in other ways, if that makes any sense.
I do. That makes sense. I strongly recommend part-time. Since I’ve worked part time, I have my work/life balance back like I haven’t since my kids were born. Good luck hunting the perfect job!
Curious, what part time position do you have?
I don’t want a career or a job but to get social security I am obligated (forced in mafia style fashion) to look for a job, but I just don’t want one. Working for money sucks. Your life doesn’t improve. And where is it law that I MUST work? No. No job. No pointless doing. I want to be free.
Thanks for your comment. What types of jobs have you had in the past? Do you think you could find something more fulfilling and rewarding to do?
I was forced into semi-retirement do to a disability. However, I will likely work part-time to support my blog and get out of debt. Working full-time is no longer for me. I prefer to live a balance life where I am being creative and enjoying family and friends.
Hi Pat, Thank you for your comment. I’m sorry to hear that you entered semi-retirement due to disability. I have had a fair share of health issues, including chronic pain, so I know what it’s like to live in a body that doesn’t always work 100% for you.
If I return to work I would also like to do so on a part-time basis. I had a lot of trouble separating my work hours from my off-work hours when I was working as a software engineer. I think it would help to know that I don’t need to put in a full 40 hours, because odds are I would still work more than 20 anyway.
It sounds like you will be able to enjoy the best of both worlds by working on your blog and finding a part-time job. All the best.
Don’t get a job just because. Do something because it fulfills you- body, mind and soul.
Hi Mari – Thanks for your comment. That’s exactly what I had in mind. A non-profit or company that shares my values! I love my current life, but I’d like to help others too. I don’t know if I can use my combination of skills to find a job/volunteer position/something that could help, but I would like to keep my options open and search for something that could be truly rewarding! I won’t get a soul-sucking job just to get one.
I recently had to experience the same..I had joined a software company as a software engineer after 2 years of gap and within 2 months I started feeling anxious as I couldn’t complete the tasks on time due to staying away from coding, I struggled to write the syntax and the team was not willing to help and I had to stretch over till late. I finally resigned as I started having health issues. I was not able to provide enough attention to my daughter and to my husband. now am also thinking that I should quit my career. My husband’s earn well and we can easily carry on our life. I have a toddler and I have started homeschooling her. I don’t want to get back to the same anxious environment. But at the same time I think about if I could get any option where I don’t have to use my mind and if I have to then there should be no deadline so that I can work stress free. But it isn’t possible. is it?
@Swati, I am now doing clerical job which don’t require deep thinking but I am in doubt now whether it’s good or not.
There are some deadlines but not really too hard to meet.
I am not feeling motivated with the mundane jobs.
It’s fascinating how similar our pasts sound, down to the desire to be an author and later a psychiatrist. I imagine that if your code did touch lives and you were motivated by something other than deadlines then coding could be rewarding again. It is scary to imagine dropping back into that mindset of success=stress, but hopefully the time away helps with overall perspective. I’m interested in learning what you decide to do!
You and I are definitely twinsies! I would never drop back into the success=stress routine, but I don’t know if a coding position exists that doesn’t inherently come with tight deadlines. It’s the nature of the beast, you know? I have a feeling my future job, (if I find one), will follow a completely different path far away from technology.
I’ve been trying to get out of the tech field for years now, still no clue what else I could do that would provide a decent living. I also think it gets harder to make a huge career change as you get older. You’ve been around the block & already know that any entry-level job is going to suck lol, so you just look @ the $$ & you can’t make anywhere close to the same $$ in something else…ugh.
Best of luck to you though
Everything you said is true. It’s much harder to leave a high paying job as you age. Older employees know it will take a whole lot of work to start over from scratch and if you aren’t passionate about your new job it will quickly wear on you. That’s why it’s such a difficult decision to make. Financial independence helps with this. The door opens when you can figure out how to live on less. Save your high salary while you earn it and you won’t have to work forever in a job you don’t enjoy. I wish you the best of luck. Come back to this blog and leave a comment if you ever decide to leave your tech job!
Some non-profit jobs can demand alot..especially if you are held accountable for program delivery and raising money. But true, if there’s something that aligns with values.
That’s the struggle. I don’t want to feel the same stress and get paid half the amount. What I’m looking for might not exist. The lure to help, might be weighed down by the amount of work required especially if it comes with tight deadlines.
Matter a break of 6 years , I have started working as a Business Analyst in IT . My first in IT that too after a long break of 6 years . Straight leap to IT from legal. Trust me, I am not impressed with my job, thought will enjoy . But I hate the idea of my day start with a meeting and end With a meeting.
I’m already confused in a months time , should I continue with this job or look for a job in legal or anything that I may enjo. Next question is, worked for 10 years, financially independent, do I really need a career . Enjoy every bit of life .
Please advise this confused soul
How long have you been working at your current job? I think every job takes a little while to adjust to. If it hasn’t been too long give it a little more time and research job crafting so you can make your job more enjoyable.
I would recommend reading the book, Designing Your Life – it gives you a good framework on how to experiment towards your ideal life. Sometimes we’re just stuck because we have no idea what we want to do. If you have an experimentation mindset, you can discover what you love.
I think I read this before, but I might need to check it out from the library again. I agree that I feel stuck, because I don’t know exactly what I want to do! Thanks for the recommendation.
From one stuck person to another – I have come to accept that there will be no perfect next thing. Instead, I have changed it to – For now, this will do. I realise that one thing leads to another thing – like cookie crumbs
It’s interesting that you left this comment. I was just looking into what types of baby steps I could take.
I like being a knowledge worker – where I can provide information or guidance or help untangle a technical problem. I like it best when my day-to-day tasks don’t involve deadlines or stressful projects. I believe having a job that requires some kind of technical skills pays a lot better than the so-called mindless jobs I can think of. Maybe there is something IT-adjacent you can do, like operations at a company you can feel good about? The sort of roles I think sound rewarding and that need some technical skills involve implementing and supporting systems people use at the workplace. That’s not my current role but I could see shifting there – but I could see that sort of role being kind of a pain if the company is cheap or the end users not very skilled at using software.
Thank you for your comment. I too like providing information and guidance. I hadn’t considered an IT adjacent career, but that could be an alternative that would pay well without as much stress as coding. Right after I left my job I thought about going into QA testing. I think I would hate production support, but diving into other IT careers is a good idea. I should think through that list before deciding to leave technology all together.
I feel the same way, although I’m still employed. In fact, I recently was promoted to CFO. I chuckle because I’m not a career-oriented person, and although I enjoy my work, I enjoy my family more.
We are saving up to quit our jobs for a few years and live on a sailboat with our children. We want to experience something completely different from suburban life in our quest to figure out what really makes a person feel fulfilled.
We’ll homeschool the kids (they are 2 and 3 now), and expose them to as much culture and natural science as we can find.
For some people, the career is enough. I have co-workers who cling to their daily routines and would rather not spend a day extra at home with their kids.
That just isn’t us.
Its nice to find like-minded people online. I enjoyed the read. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for your comment. I hadn’t thought about parents who prefer to go to work rather than dealing with their children. I know a lot of people that feel that way. They are going absolutely crazy being home with their children during COVID.
That’s amazing that you want to live on a sailboat for awhile. I recently met a couple doing that with their newborn. I’m a bit of a homebody, but it does seem fun to sail from port to port to see all the world has to offer.
I recently started homeschooling the kids and I cannot believe how many questions they have about science and nature. There is so much to learn from the world around us!
Best of luck!
Interesting post. I’ve struggled with this over the last 4 years. I’d love to go back to something substantial, but I often run into mental “deal breakers”. For someone who can manage their time efficiently, I think it’s totally possible to build something on your own. Good luck. It will be nice to hear about what’s next.
Yeah, those mental “deal breakers” make it difficult to figure out what to do next. Get up early. No thanks. Go to work for crazy long hours. Nope. The list goes on and on. It’s the time constraints that seem the worst part. If I can find a flexible job I think it’s do-able.
I resonate with this post so much. I’m a web developer working at an agency with far-too-short of deadlines and too many projects. Like you, I love the solving of problems but the rest of it exhausts me.
I keep wondering if it’s just agency life that I’m fed up with — like maybe the short deadlines and juggling would disappear if I switched over to a SAAS company. Probably wishful thinking.
Regardless, I’m hell-bent on not trying to climb the corporate ladder. I love working as a technician in my field and the last thing I want is all the added stress and responsibility that comes with the more senior and management roles. 🙂
Ha, you sound exactly like I did when it came to management positions. My bosses were always asking me if I wanted to go into management and each time I shouted, “NO!” I wanted to climb the corporate ladder during my early years as a software engineer, but like you I wanted to keep solving technical problems, which managers rarely get to do.
Have you tried interviewing for other jobs or positions to see if something more suitable fits you than your current position?